Camouflage
They ask me how I am.
I smile and reply,
I'm fine.
I hide my pain and sorrow,
I cannot show the truth.
I fear the truth would
Hurt the ones I love.
I feel lonely and despair
Of ever feeling secure,
Secure enough to share the pain,
The hurt I feel inside.
I do not want to share it
With the ones who made it so,
I fear that telling the truth of this would only make it worse.
I do not bear a grudge,
I do not hold them to blame,
For 'tis my own inadequacies that makes me behave this way.
I am insecure about myself
And my standing with my friends.
I do not have the confidence
I require to make it stop.
I huddle deep inside,
My true self lies within,
It curls up into a ball
And cries its lonesome tears.
Will the day come
When I fear not
When I can let go of all these fears
And show the real me?
Until then I will smile,
I will nod my head and say,
I'm fine,
Don't worry
I'll be there in a bit.
